Dude Looks Like a Lady

Have you ever misprounced something? Have you ever sung a lyric that wasn't quite right? Well, over the years we've come across a few of these. Here are some of my favorite examples:

1. Beau A. singing The Warrior by Scandal - "Shooting out the walls of heartache, bang, bang, I am Gloria."

2. Beau A. singing I Love Rock 'n Roll by Joan Jett - "Put another dime in the Toolbox baby."

3. J. H. singing Bad Moon Rising by Credence Clearwater Revival - "There's a Bathroom on the Right."

There are several others that I can mention - "Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza" - "Shot through the heart and you're too late" - "All those tubas covered with oil" and so many more but my very favorite of all time was several years ago when my dad came through the back door of the house singing and dancing a jig to: "Ahh, Ahh, Do the Funky Lady"

Me: Dad, what are you singing?
Dad: You know that new Aerosmith song...Do the Funky Lady...
Me: (Very frustrated that my dad is even listening to Aerosmith) The words are Dude Looks Like a Lady...
Dad: No, Ahh, Ahh, Do the Funky Lady...(still doing the jig along with the song - I'm mortified!)

Needless to say an argument insues and to this day anytime I hear that song...I sing my Dad's words not the real ones.

Now to words that are mispronounced: Here's my new favorite:

Look at the picture above. How do you pronounce this candy? Because here is the conversation that Reid and Ryan had on Friday night:

Reid: Dad, can I have one of your Who Peppers?

Ryan: (Laughing hysterically) One of my whats?

Reid: Who Peppers? That candy you are eating...(Pointing to the candy with his smartellic Reid face.)

Ryan: (Still laughing hysterically) Buddy, their called whoppers.

Reid: Oh sorry....but can I have one?

So share the wrong song lyrics or a misprounced word with someone today...you'll get a good laugh but be careful, you might just end up on somebody's blog!!!

Don't Go Breaking My "Heart" Part III

I am picking up the story on Wednesday morning. Kendall is feeling much, much, much better and has decided that she wants to go to school. Which is a good thing because the Z-pack that she has been taking has started to make her crazy - in a talking non-stop about nothing - kind of way. I wake her up on Wednesday morning, take her temp one more time just to be sure, and she starts getting ready. Oh, the joy of a normal day....

Wait...that beautiful picture of a day when both kids get on the bus and I have 30 minutes of quiet time before going to work...is shattered by these words coming from sister beater, I mean, Reid.

"Mom, I really don't feel good." You don't, what's wrong? "My head, stomach, arms, and legs all hurt, and I feel like I am going to throw up." Oh no, those are all of Kendall's symptoms. Let me check your temp....Hmmm, no fever, but you've got everything else...this must be the beginnings of the flu, these are the signs that I would have seen had I been home when Kendall first got sick with the flu. Well, looks like I will have to call Bebe and see if you can stay on her couch today...it is Wednesday, I have to go to work on Wednesday's.

I load up the Nintend* DS, thermometer, tylen*l, and the sprite and head over to Bebe's. Reid is looking really puny and has really sad eyes...which is usually a good indication of him being sick. Notice I said USUALLY! I drop Reid off, and I head to work. Wednesday's are really busy at TSC and the couple of times that I tried to call Bebe's house to check on Reid, Bebe's phone was off the hook (Thanks, Dane!) and I could not get through.

4:00 rolls around and it is time for me to wrap up my day at work. I head straight for Bebe's so that I can pick up Reid and take him home, feeling sure that he has steadily progressed into the stages of the flu during the day. Oh contraire, mon frere...I get to Bebe's to find Reid playing and acting as normal as possible. Bebe then informs me that around 1pm Reid says the following statement to her - "Bebe, I am feeling much better now, but it is way too late for you to take me to school."

What a scam artist, he faked all of Kendall's flu symptoms, to take "Reid Workman's Day Off"!!! From the clammy hands to the fake cough...he managed all the symptoms. I sure in Reid's mind he heard the words - "Life is short, you gotta stop and take a look around every once in a while." And I am sure that his friends were chanting "Save Reid, Save Reid." I did check the miles on the Ferrari in our garage. He did not drive it to Chicago to have lunch with Abe Froman, Sausage King of Chicago, sing "Twist and Shout" in a parade or take in a Cubs game. He just needed a little me time, because after all, this was his 11th sick day and if he was gonna take it, he needed to make it count!

Boy - I am in trouble!!!

Don't Go Breaking My "Heart" Part II

...Picking up the story at the ER....

We arrive at Williamson Med Center around 11ish on Sunday morning. We only have to wait a few minutes before seeing the triage nurse. The nurse asks us why we are there...well, Kendall has hurt her arm and now is running a fever...do you think they might be related? After a few arm movement tests, taking of temperature and shining of a flashlight down Kendall's throat...the triage nurse says...Yes, her arm is definitely injured but I think the fever is something totally separate, like strep. Oh great! Now we are really feeling like lousy parents. So out to the waiting room we go. Unfortunately, strep and an injured arm won't get you straight back to an ER exam room.

Sidebar - While we were waiting we met a nice mom and little boy. The little boy had fallen "into the boards" while playing hockey and injured his knee. He seemed to be in a lot of pain...I pray that they received good news.

After a little while, we got called back to the ER exam room. The 1st nurse comes in and gets Kendall's symptoms...then the nurse practioner comes in...then the doctor...and yes, we had to explain each time that we were there for both an arm injury and a fever. Finally, an x-ray tech comes to take x-rays of Kendall's arm - He had a really funny entrance while reading Kendall's chart - "10 year old vs. tree...not a good idea". During all of the waiting, Kendall's fever manages to climb to 103ish.

Also, while we are waiting, I finally get to ask Kendall how this arm injury actually happened. And I learned that Ryan did not know the actuall story either. Here is what Kendall says happened to her arm. "Reid and I were playing in Auntie Jenny's neighbors yard. They have a rope swing. I was on the swing and Reid was pushing me. Reid started pushing me way to high and I got all crazy and as I swung back I whacked the tree with this part of my arm (pointing to the forearm) and with this part of my shoulder (revealing a nice scrape and bruise). It hurt so bad and I was crying. Reid tried to apologize to me but I would not have any part of that. He tried to hug me and kiss me and I just wanted to be left alone." But Kendall, it was an accident and he was trying to apologize which is the way we've taught you guys to treat each other. "I know but I just wasn't ready to hear it right then." But have you accepted his apology since then? "Yes." Okay, then we're good? "Yes, we are good but this is the 2nd time that I've had to come to the ER because of Reid, and I am not happy about it." I know, honey, I am so sorry.

**For those of you that don't know, Kendall had to go to the ER last summer because she and Reid were outside playing. She was on an electric scooter, he was playing ball. She was coming down the hill, Reid lost control of the ball, the ball and scooter collided. Kendall went over the handlebars of the scooter, knocked out 3 teeth and had to have stitches in her mouth. I still think she may be harboring a little anger from this incident**

So, the final verdict eventually came down from the ER doctors and nurses...the fever was being caused by an upper respitory infection and the flu...the arm pain was being caused by a severe contusion (possibly a hairline fracture but the swelling and bruising was so severe, the fracture could not be seen on xrays). Give her an antibiotic and an arm brace...tylen*l and m*trin for pain and fever...wait a few days...she will be back on her feet.

This is Kendall on our way home from the ER:



We stopped at Steak N Shake, stop at Bebe's to pick up sister-beater, I mean, to pick up Reid, the pharmacy and then home. She did not eat a single fry. And for those of you who know Kendall, you know that she loves her some Steak N Shake fries and wouldn't miss them for anything but the flu and a sprained arm. Can you say "wiped out"?

Later on Sunday evening in her best Scarlett O'Hara voice, as her temperature has risen to 104.5...(hand and cold washcloth on forehead, stripped down to a tank top and undies) "Mom, I'm so hot, and everything hurts, I just don't think I'm going to make it through the night!" Oh baby, I am so sorry, but you are going to make it, and just in case, I'm going to call Nurse/Auntie Jenny for some "at what point do I get worried about the fever" advise. Okay, mom, but seriously, I am not going to make it. Just rest, baby, just rest. And she did...for the rest of Sunday and most of Monday and Tuesday. With the exception of the "check my temp, I need meds, something to drink or eat" I hardly heard from her.

Well, as you all know, Kendall has made it through the flu, the URI, the sweats, the chills, the throw-up, the antibiotics that made her bounce of the walls, and she is still wearing the arm brace for a few more days to make sure that her arm is completely healed. Thank you for all of your prayers for healing and pain relief! I'm sure without them, she really would not have made it through Sunday night.

Stay tuned for Part III of the "Don't Go Breaking My "Heart/Arm" saga. The sister-beater, I mean Reid, pulls a fast one on Wednesday....

Don't Go Breakin' My "Heart" Part I

And by the "Heart" quotes, I mean Don't Go Breakin' Your Sister's Arm, Reid!!!

So, I told you to stay tuned to find out what happened to Kendall while I was down in the Dirty South going to Broadway shows, filling up on yummy Southern cuisine, and playing with Baby Davis...

Friday evening, I called Ryan to check-in, to let him know that I missed him, that the show was fabulous and to check on the kids. He did mention that Kendall had hurt her arm while playing with Reid, but in his Daddy manhood - he thought it wasn't really hurt and she was just being dramatic....really, Kendall, dramatic...???!!! I also let him know that it would be late when I got home on Saturday. He let me know that he and Reid were going to Uncle Tim's to go four wheeling for the day and that Kendall had decided to stay at Bebe's for the day. The conversation went something like this - Sounds like a good plan, love you, love you, too, have fun shopping tomorrow, have fun and be careful on the four wheelers, see you tomorrow...blah, blah, blah.

I returned home late on Saturday evening. Ryan is in the garage putting the four wheelers up...he casually mentions that Bebe thought that Kendall was running fever earlier and that Bebe had given her some tylenol. Okay, no big deal, right? Kendall and Reid were upstairs watching Harry Potter so of course, they did not come down to greet me, which is not unusual...especially since I told them NOT to expect souveniers from the Sunday School conference. I hollered up the stairs, "Hey kids, I'm home, going to bed, love you" to which they replied, "Love you, too" - Kendall may have said something about her arm pain but since I was told that the injury was "no big deal" I just said, "I am so sorry to hear that...love you, goodnight"...and off to bed I went.

Sunday morning arrives WAY to early since it is Daylight Savings Time and time to spring forward. Ryan and I get up and start our Sunday morning routine. Then Ryan goes up to wake the kids. He comes back downstairs with a very worried look on his face..."I don't think that Kendall is okay" he says. So I say, "Really, why not?"...Pause..."Well, I just took her temperature and it is 102.5, and she can not move her arm." What...I thought the arm thing was no big deal...I barely remember you saying that she had a fever...did you actually take care of the kids while I was away for 3 days...What are you saying? Okay, focus, make a few phone calls, drop Reid off at Bebe's, take a quick shower, brush teeth, and off to the ER on Sunday morning we go...


She was feeling really crummy and did not want to smile but I made her do it anyway...can't have an ER pic with a frown...which may be why she has such a fake smile on her face.

Stay tuned for the ER details and to find out how the arm injury actually happened.....

Girls Night Out

So what do you do after 2 days at a Sunday School Conference in Woodstock, Georgia? You take Alicia and Ashley, drive over to Jeff and LeAnn's in Marietta, quickly change into your GNO clothes, and head into Midtown Atlanta and you have a fabulous Girls Night Out!

And, of course, the first item on a fabulous Girls Night Out, dinner at the South City Kitchen...YUM-O!!!
Which included fried green tomatoes, fried chicken and crab hash...after all, we are in the dirty south....
And beautifully presented desserts of rice pudding, banana pudding and pecan pie...remember that south thing again....


And then, you hop in the truck, drive a few blocks to the historic Fox theater and you see a show. That is of course, after you turn into the wrong parking lot, jump a curve - "Where's the road?", drive to the correct parking lot, listen to the parking attendents argue over whether or not an Expedition will fit in the garage, park, shimmy out the doors of the truck, follow curiously non-professional written signs into the theater - "that economic downturn is affecting everyone!", quickly walk to your seats (man, did I really just eat that much)....sit, adjust, breathe, lights out. A Chorus Line...what a fantastic musical in an awesome theater!!! "Jeff, we had a wonderful time and you would have hated every minute of it!"

Of course, we topped our Girls Night Out with a Girls day of more food, museums, and shopping on Saturday. We went to the Flying Biscuit for Fried Green Tomato BLTs, Shrimp and Grits, Eggs-ceptional Eggs, Black Bean Quesadillas, and Davis had yummy french toast!
Then, we headed over to the puppet museum for the Jim Henson exhibit - Big Bird is really big - and one LeAnn's favorite places on earth...


Alicia - "You mean to tell me that this one store is large enough to have its own 2 level parking garage?" LeAnn - "Yep, isn't it great?" We had so much fun looking at all of the cool stuff and we even managed to put a "few" items into our cart. We then headed back to Jeff and LeAnn's unloaded Jeff's Expedition into mine and headed home. Adult time with LeAnn and the girls...a "Broadway" show...baby time with Davis...food, glorious southern food...shopping...does it get any better?

Well, it maybe could have....the Nascar boys were in Atlanta for the weekend...I just couldn't talk LeAnn, Davis, Alicia and Ashley into going to the race......Terri - where were you when I needed you????

Stay tuned for what happened when I got home......

Stayin Alive

(Think Marilyn Monroe for just one second.....)

Happy Birthday to You....Happy Birthday to You....Happy Birthday, Mr. Po Po....Happy Birthday to you!!!!
Well the cake may have said R.I.P. and he may have turned 40....BUT Shane Shetler is Stayin Alive and enjoying a little surprise birthday party that was thrown by Stephanie, his lovely wife (and one of my BFF's).

So first, we all hid in the Venue hallway to surprise Shane. Stephanie told him that they had birthday dinner reservations but she needed to drop off folders at church. Should you really hide in a dark hallway and scream Happy Birthday while jumping out to a cop? You can but you better hope he is not ridin' dirty.

Of course we had a fabulous food spread of rotel, artichoke dip, sausage balls, and ham sammies and so once you are full on all of the yummy stuff, how do you entertain a 40 year old who is 6' 6" and loves the Bee Gees? You sing karaoke, of course!!!

Kyle Carrasco, You are a Brick House!!!

And the funniest song of the evening has to go to 4 guys and a funeral....Peaz, Karrotz, Korn and Roderick singing YMCA.

Birthday love for dad from Pey-Pey....Is the group above fruits or vegetables?

Happy Birthday to Shane...We had an AWESOME time at your party. Maybe we can do it again for my birthday...because after all, that was the best birthday party that I ever had...I mean...the best birthday party that I ever went to!!!